


You Were Gone (Let This End)

by KatOnlyThinks



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Edward Cullen Bashing, No Beta, Past Edward Cullen/Bella Swan, Rating May Change, Revenge, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-25 12:34:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30089169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatOnlyThinks/pseuds/KatOnlyThinks
Summary: Victoria has been taunting Bella since the Cullens left. Bella is ready to die, she doesn't want to be toyed with anymore. What happens when she looks her death in the face? Will the Cullens be back in time to save her from herself?
Relationships: Emmett Cullen/Rosalie Hale, Jasper Hale/Bella Swan
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	You Were Gone (Let This End)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure if this will be a good story. It's the first story I've published and I'm posting all that I've written. Let me know if I should continue it. Please enjoy!

B-POV  
The nightmares always start the same. I’m always outside on my roof laying down as much as one can on a roof watching the stars. I always look to my right side and see him coming onto my roof. I always go to push him off and hope that he doesn’t come back. He always grabs me with his vampire strength and covers my mouth. He always takes me to the woods. He always says that he never cared about me. He always leaves without a trace and leaves me there to die. Victoria always comes back and changes me. She puts me through the worst pain imaginable and I know that someday soon it will happen. I can only hope that he comes back to change me before she does. I only want to be changed by someone I love, it doesn’t matter if they don’t love me back.  
I know that today is the day that I am going to die. Victoria has been taunting me all week. She’ll tap on my window and then right as I look she’ll look through the glass and smile with blood on her face. She leaves me little notes in my bed. Last night I put one up in the window with the words on it ‘I’ll be at their old house in the back. Come and get me.’ Hopefully she would listen because all I want is for this nightmare to be over. The wolves help but they can’t save me there. Whatever she does they can’t save me there.   
At 5 in the morning I wake up because of a nightmare and decide to write goodbye letters to everyone I care about that I can still see. To everyone that I care about that’s not a Cullen. I write to Jake about how I’ll miss him. I write to the pack to make sure they know that it wasn’t their fault. After all it was my decision and nothing could have changed that. Maybe Edward didn’t understand that, or maybe he just liked to see me in pain I don’t know. But I can’t think of a reason why he would get close to me just to leave. I sent one last email to Alice too. Hopefully she actually responds this time but I doubt she will. She left with him and didn’t even say goodbye. Shows how much she cares. I told her this in my last email to her. 

E-POV  
I do my best to stay away from Jasper. My emotions would make no sense for what I had done. Though I regretted getting with Bella I can’t regret going to Forks. I had finally found my mate. She was a vampire that was passing through and as soon as we saw each other we knew that we were mates. She has a power too. She can block and/or steal anyone’s power when she wants. When I was with Bella I realized that I just loved the mystery. I just liked the silence that I got and the mystery of it all. And best of all, no one knows. And to think I wasted all that time with that human. 

B-POV  
I sat down in the Cullen’s back yard waiting for death. I thought about how it was going to hurt and decided that I didn’t care. Maybe she would lose control like I hope. She could just outright kill me and leave me in eternal peace. I can think of multiple people who would like that for me. What else could they want if they are just going to leave. Maybe I could go to the Volturi, but it's too late now. I watch the forest as I see a flash of red. I call out knowing Victoria will hear me.   
“Victoria I know you're there. Please just kill me now.” I don’t see a response but I can tell that she stopped moving to listen. This time I scream, “Please just kill me!” I can tell that she has gotten closer out of curiosity and I get a pocket knife out of my hoodie pocket. I feel entirely calm as I open the blade and put it against my skin. With a little pressure and a quick swipe of my hand I cut my vein. I look down and see the blood before I feel her biting into my neck. When I can feel the blood loss getting to be too much I try to lean my head against the house I was sitting against but Victoria stops me. She keeps me where I was until I’m so close to death and then she gets up and walks a little away. Before the fire I feel is too much to pay attention to anything else I hear her say one last thing with a demented giggle.   
“Oh little bird, death is too good for you. I promise you’ll die but you will be coming right on back to life.” At the end of this very statement I see Emmett and Edward rip her apart and then the fire consumes my thoughts.  
E-POV  
I saw her get bit and was too far away to do anything about it. I heard Victoria laugh as she walked away. And then she saw us. She looked left and right and tried to run as far away as she could. To bad Jasper was with us. She tried to plead with us to keep living as we ripped her apart. right before I detached her head she laughed and screamed my way. “Too bad you couldn’t save your little pet now isn’t it?” Emmett and Jasper took care of burning her and went to check on my Bella. I saw Alice fervorous looking in the future and saw each vision that she did. There was no way to save Bella from this life without leading to her death.   
I could only watch in pain as she let out a whimper caused by the pain. Other than that she made no noise during her 3 day long change. When she finally woke up a vampire we had already moved her into the basement and everyone was around the room. She looked really confused for a second.   
“Why are all of you here?” She finally said in complete confusion.   
Alice was the one to respond, everyone else was too worried that she would freak out as a newborn. “Well I saw you get changed and we were too late to stop that but at least we could help you out.  
Bella started to scream at all of us after that. “Really. You come back for my death but not the depression of the empty void that I was in for months. You couldn’t come back to kill Victoria before she started to interrupt my life. You couldn’t save me from befriending Jacob only to find out that he isn’t human either. You couldn’t save me from the unimaginable pain that you put me through. And for what you don’t even care for me! All I was to you was a toy! Just a silly human to play with the emotions of!” She pauses to give herself a chance to look in the mirror that we had in the room. In this moment Jasper spoke up.  
“Why aren’t you attacking us with everything you’re feeling right now?” I listened to his thoughts and he was as all over the place as one could be. For what I could tell her emotion was entirely too strong for a newborn not to be fighting but he was so confused about what she was actually saying. No one had known what I told her that night in the woods. Alice thought at me Edward. I swear to God if you don’t tell me whatever you said to her that night… Bella started talking before she finished that thought.   
“As much as I’m mad right now I don’t want to hurt any of you. However much you hurt me I don’t want to hurt any of you.” As if to prove her point she hugged Rosaline and whispered as silently as she could “Thank you for coming back to me.” She looked around the room to everyone but me before speaking again. This time in a calm almost sad voice. “As much as I love all of you, and I really do, I can’t trust you anymore, except Jasper and Rosaline. You all left me and I thought you cared. At least they didn’t play with the human.” She looked down then and then back to the mirror. She put her hand up to her throat and asked one last thing before stopping talking “Jasper will you take me hunting?”  
Everyone around the room was thinking variations of the same thing. Why didn’t she ask Edward? Why isn’t Edward taking her? and my favorite What did you do Edward?. That last one was the main thought of everyone but Emmett and Rosaline. Well and probably Bella but I still can’t hear her thoughts. Jasper looked at me with hatred in his eyes and said “Yeah, I’ll take you Bella. Do you want to go wait outside for a second while we all talk to Edward?” Bella nodded and as soon as Emmett and Jasper moved ran up the stairs.   
“What did you do Edward?” Both Jasper and Alice spoke at the same time. Emmett moved back to his spot when they spoke. From his thought I gathered that it was to keep me down here until all of their questions were answered.  
“I’ll tell you the whole story but you can’t interrupt me until I’m finished okay. And you have to take Bella hunting first.” Everyone reluctantly agreed and Jasper left to take Bella hunting with thoughts of all of the different ways he could hurt me. Everyone but Emmet and I had left the basement and then Emmett went back to his spot guarding the stairs from being climbed. He thought out at me before I asked why.   
I don’t know what you did but as soon as I find out you are gonna wish that you never came back. “Emmett please just let me go. I haven’t left her side since we came back.” We wouldn’t have had to come back if we had changed her the first time and brought her with us. “I know but there nothing we can do about that now. Please just let me be alone until they get back. It's gonna hurt her to hear this story. It’s also gonna hurt me to tell it.” I was really glad that he wasn’t able to tell I was half lying. It would hurt me to tell them but you know that’s just because of all the time I wasted on a silly human girl instead of my mate. This time Emmett spoke out loud with the intention that everyone would hear.   
“You’re lucky that Bella doesn’t want you to be hurt. Really fucking lucky.” And he went upstairs to join the rest of our family. The family that was mentally cursing me and wondering what I had done. I said out loud just to be sure that they were listening, “When Bella and Jasper come back from hunting I will tell you about what I did and she will have to tell you about everything after that IF she remembers.”   
Everyone nodded their heads and sat down in the living room by their respective partners. Alice and I were the only ones without people and we had a silent conversation. Is it really bad? He thought I nodded. Do you think that she will forgive you? I shrug. I didn’t actually care about that. Do you want to be forgiven? That was her last thought to me because after I hung my head to pretend to think about it time flew. When I heard the back door close I started to pay attention again…. Why couldn’t I hear Jasper? I heard Bella whisper to him that she was going to shower and then he joined us .  
After Bella got in the shower Jasper came down and gave me a look. I knew that he was mentally speaking to me but I couldn’t hear him. Why couldn’t I hear him? Before I could ask Bella was behind Jasper.  
No One-POV  
“What’s going on?” She said.   
“Nothing too bad.” Alice told her unable to know what she was feeling. Unable to know that would make the hopelessness stronger..   
For a moment it looked like she was too frozen to move but then she surprised us all. She cut herself away from all emotions. Jasper freaked out. Alice couldn’t see the future any more. And she stood up straight and asked one more time, “What. Is. Going. On.”   
Jasper started to freak out because he couldn’t feel her emotions anymore. She didn’t seem to be attached to them anymore he told me in his thoughts. He told me that they just weren’t even there anymore. Before he could say anything out loud Emmett spoke up afraid that she would run. “We just need to know what happened when we left. Edward asked Alice not to look into your future and he wouldn’t tell us what he said to you. He told us that you wanted a clean break but we need the full story now. We need the truth.”   
She slowly turned to me but before she could say anything Jasper spoke up. “Why can’t I feel your emotions anymore?”  
“Better question,” Alice spoke. “Why can’t I see your future? Everything is just gone.”  
E-POV  
“Edward.” Bella started ignoring everyone else. “You didn’t want to tell them what a toy I was.” I suddenly felt a wake of despair but I wasn’t able to move anymore. I couldn’t even blink. “You didn’t want to tell them about how you didn’t ever love me. You didn’t want Alice to see how I didn’t take care of myself for months on end because you were gone. Or how about the way I switched one supernatural creature for the other. Vampires werewolves, what's the difference. You didn’t want her to know that I wanted Victoria to change me or kill me. You didn’t want them knowing that YOU. ARE. THE. REASON. THAT. I. WANTED. TO. DIE!!!!!!” She screamed at the end. WIth every word she said I felt more and more despair until I had no hope left. Jasper felt everything I did and told everyone what was happening with me still being unable to move.   
“Every word she said he felt despair but it wasn’t his. Bella took all her emotion and locked them away only to throw the emotions at him.” And then it all just disappeared and Bella who still hadn’t paid them any attention said in the smallest voice she could.  
“It’s not my fault that I was human.” And with that all of her emotions could be felt. Her emotion was so strong Jasper fell down and came to the conclusion that she had been feeling emotions this strong since we left. He knew that was the only way that anyone would be able to stand them at that strength. He tried so hard to talk but the emotion was so strong it took him a few minutes to respond.  
“Bella” he whispered. “How.. long… have… you… felt.... emotions…. that…. strong?” He whispers having to pause between each word. Finally she turned her head and looked at the family. She gasped when she realized what she had done to him.   
“I’m sorry Jasper.” She said after a gasp from seeing how broken down she had him. “Every single day since you left. This is actually better than I was before I was changed.” Everyone looked shocked and Emmett marched up to me and I realized that I could move again. I took a step back and bumped into a wall. Emmett continued to march until we were nose to nose and told me in a low threatening voice.  
“If you ever hurt her again you will be sorry. The only reason I’m not beating you into a pulp right now is because I’ve seen how miserable you’ve been and she hasn’t hit you yet.” All he wanted to do was beat me to a pulp he kept imagining how badly I would be hurt and how happy it could make Bella. I shuddered involuntarily at how many things he would be willing to do to me if Bella told him he could.  
“I know” I tell him truthfully, but I could lie to them. As much as I wanted to say I would let him I wouldn’t, I actually have my own mate now. I can’t just let it all go because of a stupid child and her stupid wishes. 

B-POV

When I saw Jasper collapse at the strength of my emotions I knew that I had to leave. Everyone rushed over to him and I backed away.When I was Emmett and Edward nose to nose I looked around at them and realized that this was all because of me. Maybe it was better when they weren’t here I took one last look at Jasper and he looked at me confused. I whisper. “Sorry,” and then I ran. I ran until I knew that I was so far away that no one would be able to find me and no one would even notice that I was gone so what was the point of running any further.   
I decided to hunt before I went further, at some point or another I was going to pass a town or something and I didn’t want to kill anyone. I didn’t ever want to kill anyone. When I found a group of deer I drank two making sure to not kill the young. At least they would get a chance in the world. After I drank I thought about how much what I wanted had wanted. I wanted to be a vampire and hunt down the Cullens but now all I want to to be free of my emotions. All they do is get in the was and I have morals so I would go rampaging I just didn’t want to feel them this strong anymore. Jasper who had been dealing with emotions his entire vampire life couldn’t stand up with the strength of mine. At least now that I was gone he would be able to function. Who would have know, I was always mad at them for leaving but Jasper wouldn’t even have been able to be in the same area as me.   
I realize now that I should have died. I should have just given up in the woods in the Cullen land just so that I wouldn’t have been found by Sam. Just so that I could have never gotten close to the wolds and died the night that they left. I know the only reason that they found me was because of their noses. The freaking wolf noses just had to come and find me that night. I was perfectly fine with dying and they took that option away from me the moment that they turned into wolves to find me. The Cullens gave me that option the day I left. I decided that there was one thing left that I could do. I would go to the Volturi. I know that they are in Volterra, Italy and that the rule. I am positive that if I ask them to kill me they will.   
I know Alice would see it but I didn’t care. I am too alone to be able to stay just for Alice. She doesn’t even want me anyways. I have no hope and I don’t even have control of my power. Besides I know that Edward still can’t read my mind why would there mind reader be able to. Now the only problem was getting there and finding them. I know that I won’t be able to go for a while but I just have to. I can’t go back to the Cullen I realize. I would never be able to say good bye. I realized that I was doing to exact same thing that they had done to me. I knew that I was pacing thing about it but I stopped functioning like that. I just broke down. I don’t know how long I just sat there and cried, wishing for tears.   
I felt a hand on my shoulder and jumped. I crossed the short little clearing I had made and turned back hunched in a defensive position. When I saw that it was Emmett I walked over and threw myself into his arms. I just sobbed into him and said that I was sorry over and over again. I knew that I couldn’t go back to their house if Jasper was there so I collected myself and but a brave face on.   
“Where’s Jasper?” I asked surprised at the strength that my voice had.   
“He went to go hunt.” Emmett said with a dazed look on his face while straightening his back. When he did that he looked like a soldier.   
“Why?” I asked in the same tone I used before.  
“Your emotions took a really big toll on him. He wanted to feed before being around you again.” He said the dazed look never leaving his face. I looked up and decided to test something out. Again in the same tone I was using I said a simple command.   
“Tell everyone that you found me and that I would like to see Esme and Carlisle. Bring both Carlisle and Esme here.” I gave a short little nod after I stopped speaking. Emmett was gone in an instant. When I saw him coming back I realized my mistake everyone else was coming too. I looked closer at Emmett sense he was getting closer and saw that he still had the dazed look on his face.   
“Emmett you can stop looking like that now.” said Rose. It was obvious that she was starting to get mad.   
In just a few more seconds they were here and the look fell off of Emmett’s face. He looked around confused. “When do you get here?” He asked.   
“What do you mean you brought us here?” asked Alice whom of which was very confused.   
“I might be able to explain I used a commanding voice I guess and he got this dazed look on his face and listened to me.” I could tell everyone was thinking it over and then I saw Jasper. It looked like he was struggling with each step he took.   
I saw Edward coming behind him and heard the end of what he said. “It’s just gonna hurt you why are you doing this to yourself?”  
Luckily I heard Jasper’s response before I started to run again. “Because unlike you I care.” I turned to look at him in shock. I was told that I was nothing but a plaything and believed it for months on end but now I finally got the hope that I needed. Maybe I wouldn’t need to go to the Volturi after all. With my hope Jasper was able to walk toward us. Esme then asked a question that I hope she never asks again.  
“Can you project what she is feeling onto us? Full strength?” He looked at me and I started to back away shaking my head.  
“Sorry. You know I have to show them.” Jasper said making me lose all my hope once again. He started to sway but remained upright. In just a few moments all of the Cullens except Jasper and I had fallen. When Jasper let the feeling fall away Esme looked at me with venom filled eyes and then turned and walked up to Edward who was still on the ground. She picked him up by his ear and you could see him wincing as it started to tear off.   
“What is wrong with you? You couldn’t leave her be but then you have to break her.” She smacked him and walked back to Carlisle.   
“I had no idea that it would do that to you.” Alice said looking as if it was her decision to leave.   
“Alice, you couldn’t have known. You trusted your brother and you knew that it would hurt him to look into my future. Don’t feel bad for respecting what he wanted. He is your family he comes first.” I told her truthfully. “I don’t want to interrupt your normal life. I’m here only because I haven’t been told to leave yet.” Everyone looked at me shocked. I hope they didn’t realize that I was going to leave no matter what. I guess that they didn’t realize that I was going to say that but luckily Carlisle stepped up and said something.  
“Bella you were family the first day that you walked through that door. You were a part of this family when you were more scared of if we would like you or not than the fact that we were vampires. You are a part of this family and will always be welcome with us.” During his speech he walked up and hugged me. I couldn’t stand the way that they were ignoring their actual family.  
“No I’m not. I didn’t come first. I was never supposed to be here. I would have died anyway and I just wasn’t meant to be part of your world.” I looked around at all of them and decided that I would have to say something more. I would have to say the one thing that I didn’t want to have to use. “All I was, I’ll I have ever been to you was a pet. I just just a plaything nothing more. I never had Edward’s love and I shouldn’t have yours. You can leave a pet behind, you can’t leave family. No matter how much you beg and plead and tell me otherwise I don't believe anything else. Edward is your son. I am a pet. Never once have I seen a human with compassion choose their dog over their own son. He is your son. All I am is a stray dog that wormed my way into your lives.” I looked down unable to stand the looks from them. “I don’t belong here and he does. Don’t let the pity you have for me control your lives.” I heard a gasp from Jasper and saw him go down. “Besides my emotions are too strong for Jasper. It's not safe for you guys if I’m around.”   
“Don’t leave…” Jasper forced out.   
“He thinks that he will be able to get used to it if you’re around long enough.” Edward said looking down with a disgusted look on his face. He was going to continue speaking but when Carlisle gave him a look he shut his mouth and stayed silent.  
“Jasper all I do is hurt you. You won’t be able to stand it. I can’t stay around just to hurt you.” We looked into each other’s eyes and had a silent conversation. Near the end my eyes teared up with venom that will never fall and I used my commanding tone once more. “Stand down Jasper.”   
He immediately looked down and saying, “Yes, Ma’am.” Everyone looked appalled except Jasper who still had the glazed look on his face.   
“I have to leave, it hurts Jasper too much and I can’t live like that. I’m sorry.” I was watching Jasper as I said that waiting for the glazed look to leave his face. As it did I looked down and told them that I was sorry and that they should go back to the house. “Goodbye. Can’t say that I hope to see you again.” And with that I walked away. It took all my willpower to keep walking but I know that its better for Jasper this way. He is the only one of them that I can truly care about anymore. Thankfully after my shower I got a hold of Alice’s credit cards and order myself a plane ticket straight to Volutra. Hopefully the Volturi will end this horrible existence that I was forced into. I can only hope. I thought to myself as I ran to the airport. I can see the airport when I collapse. The pain of my heart is too much for me to bare. I crawl back hoping to make it to La Push. Hopefully they will put me out of my misery.


End file.
